Unschooling … is the school structure actually crumbling our kids?

Recently , I have been listening about parent experiences where they discuss how a predetermined structure in the form of curriculum and classes provided by established institutions like schools is stifling our children, instead of serving them.

Unschooling unlike homeschooling is to withdraw them from any kind of predetermined structure or time line. In comparison to homeschooling where you look into different curriculums and choose the one that works for you, in unschooling you decide to let learning happen as instinctively and naturally without a milestone chart to refer to in hand.

I was thoroughly intrigued by this . I understand the motivation behind such a decision is the same urge that I often have , to remove the sense of urgency and competition from the experience of learning .

I am a lifelong student , I have studied in the most conventional and disciplined institutes . I have pursued the most traditional career choice of medicine being an academically brilliant kid despite a lot of creative skills which could have been materialised.

I would not say I thrived in the school system . In fact , I did change school because I thought I outgrew my initial one and was also getting bullied by teenage girls forming cliques and operating against the simple nerdy ones .

The change in school, even though still very conventional and competitive, was a new playing ground for my skills and for the short time I spent there provided enough novelty to keep me thriving.

When it comes to schooling for my kids , I did choose a school with more extra curricular focus . I had enough confidence on my academic genes to gamble on that aspect . I presumed my children would naturally score well in academics as that I can serve and foster at home .

My strategy has somehow worked , as they are in class 4 now , they do well academically with minimal help. No dependence on tuitions keeps them interested in school and makes them confident that learning is possible with minimal external outsourced help. They do extracurriculars as and when they are offered in school performing average at best in most fields .

But as the expectations of the world around them increases , they are being asked to excel now , not just participate .

I have been a forever champion of participation and that’s the most important part for me . I am a firm believer of ‘jack of all trades’ is better than ‘master of one’ as one never gets bored or demotivated in such a situation.

I understand that finding a niche is important to build a career and eventually monetising your talent but in my humble opinion, overspecialising too early can put unnecessary burden and nip the talent in the bud.

At least in the primary schooling years I want my children to experience and participate and make as many mistakes as they want without the fear of being perfect or achieving mastery in any one area .

I want them to understand what all is on offer for them and then choose later in life what they can easily and most masterfully pursue in the future.

Not every hobby need to be turned pro , or be monetised. Leave some passions as only pleasurable pursuits .

While school does hinder their natural learning at times but for now I think if as a parent I can remind myself and the children time and again that we are not going to school to perform but to learn.

We have stopped aspiring to prove ourselves at school. We love the challenges offered at school and participate as much as possible with the intention to learn , grow and enjoy the diverse experiences.

The peer pressure and competitiveness is an absolutely tangible phenomenon at school but instead of removing ourselves from it’s dynamic entirely , we intend to stay in the structure and use it to our advantage by practising self restraint and being intentional in our pursuits while navigating the undercurrents of herd mentality.

What is your opinion about unschooling? Do share in the comments .

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