When you hit the dawn of adulthood , and marriage knocks on your door , you innocently open to embrace love but what you get is a Pandora’s box of endless , senseless and useless rituals and responsibilities which the Indian parent has very carefully passed on from one moronic generation to another .
One such absolutely futile and rather complicated ritual is the Sagan ka Lifafa .
After 6 years of marriage , and trying to use my genius brains to carefully analyse the dynamics of what goes behind the curation of these unique lifafas , I have come to the conclusion that despite being a prodigy (if I may confess) , I have miserably failed to decipher the kissa lifafe ka. (The curious case of Sagan ka Lifafa)
The only rationale I have come to after multiple trial and errors of getting the right amount of lifafa to the right person is that , in the rat race of the lifafa , the only thing you are sure to come out as is A rat!
I have looked hard for the scales which decide the amount that goes into these lifafas often handed over to you as blessings .
For the foolish , naive me , I thought it was the amount you are capable of gifting your near and dear ones , a little up or down depending on how close you are in relation.
But no, apparently it is trickier than that . How foolish of you Mansi, what were you expecting ! This stuff is more twisted than your small intestines.
It also depends on a careful assessment of a variety of factors based in the past along with some that you have to predict might occur in the future , with a little titration up and down depending upon the impression you want to put on the recipient .
This is one exam I fail every single year . No matter how stringent my homework is , no matter how much love has gone into packing the lifafa, in the fag end , I am given a poor performance certificate .
Initially the oh-so-revolutionary , professional and educated me tried to explain it to others that this whole lifafa business is pure bullsh*t . As expected, just like the innumerable times earlier , I was labelled the black sheep of the family.
So I gave up and complied with the social norms, trying my best in every single attempt to ace the art of giving an aptly loaded lifafa.
Alas, after all these years of flunking and being deeply hurt as well, I have found my way.
From today onwards I refuse to accept any Sagan ka lifafa from anyone .
Since I would be considered cheap if I didn’t give it , I have realised the only way to shun this practice is to do what is in my control. I will not accept any blessings in the form of a Sagan ka lifafa / cash to begin with . This is my form of gentle protest against this nonsensical practice which degrades more people than it uplifts .
It might not cure the Indian society of the plague of the lifafa it is ridden with , but it will definitely make a small dent in my universe .
Signing off after tonight’s rant on Friday Night. Now you know why the blog has been named FridayNightColumn!
Do share your opinion about the above practice , and enlighten me.