Life in a joint family is no less than a daily soap opera . Having been brought up in one such family , I never needed much source of entertainment from outside . My house was always full of siblings and the doors were perpetually open for visitors (they still are).
I admire my mother for innumerable qualities unique to her .She is the most perceptive person I have ever encountered . She has taught me that ambition does not make you a loud person . You can be calm , serene and still on the surface yet aim for the stars.But one of the most endearing aspect is her capacity to share . The selflessness with which she made us the children of the family and not just her own belongings was exceptional.
I would not be wrong in saying that I was raised by 4 mothers .
And that is not including my current mother , my mother-in-law.( I have surely been blessed in the mother’s department).
Besides my biological mother , I am immensely loved by my Gogmom (a short form for gogi mama, my badi mumma ) . She is the quintessential all rounder woman from the 70 s who knows her P’s from her Q’s. Talented beyond imagination , she is great in every task she puts her hand in . She made the special treats in the kitchen , ran a boutique and was the make-shift dadima for us when it came to storytelling. She was fully equipped with all skills needed in the perfect homemaker of that era .She pampered me to the core. My mother never needed to handle my tantrums , because gogmom would always come to her rescue.
Then came Bavydi, my biological bua. While people would call their father their ATM , for us it was Bavydi. We just knew that any over-the-top demand , needed only Bavydi ‘s approval. She still remains the CEO of our family. Extremely ambitious and a brilliant manager , she knows how to get the job done . A voracious reader and gadget-free till date , she is not the one you could fool. She orchestrates the whole household with her astute administration. I didn’t need to attend a B-school to know what power women are, I had witnessed that fervour in my own premises.
Last but not the least, is my dearest Chachi. When I was asked by my Bhabhi that do I want my niece to call me Chhoti mumma or Chachi , I quipped , ‘Ofcourse, Chachi ! , because chachis are fun. ‘ When you have grown up with a quirky , fun and charming chachi , whose creativity has no bounds , you aspire to be a similar influence in someone’s life.
Being a mother now , I can only show gratitude towards all these wonderful women who have nurtured me . Each one has been a guiding source and a mentor . They inspire me every second.
When I strive to be the supermom (like every mother does) , I remind myself that I need to take a breather because it does take a village to raise a child . All we need to learn is to have trust on others and on our kids . We are not all-encompassing , hence we cannot teach them everything in life , they need to have more people in their social circle who can inspire them.
One of the monumental lessons I have learnt from my childhood is of not being possessive about my babies. My mother let us grow under the tremendous love of the whole family , which has only honed our personalities for the better . You can collectively bring up your children (if you have the opportunity) because on sharing , love only doubles. And on the plus side , it gives you a lot of me-time as well 😉
So mommies , share the load ! Grandparents , massi, mama, bua, chachi, friends , whoever is your inner circle. Hand them your kids TODAY!
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